What Do You Do?

What do you do?

When you're so lonely, but surrounded?

When they want every piece of you, every cell, but when you speak, you have to repeat yourself three times because they weren't listening?

When you want to talk, to explain, to request, but when you do, you can't be rational anymore, so it all tumbles out in an unintelligible, unreasonable, overly-aggressive set of demands?

When you want to escape, but you have nowhere to go?

When you want a break, but the truth is, if you take one, it all falls apart, because you've taken on so many roles that no one else can be the understudy?

When they're all asleep and you're alone, eyeing up the sharp knives in the block, just wishing to have that feeling again; the blissful one when you can SEE the self-hatred dripping out of your now less-than-perfect skin and you begin to feel cleansed?

When you promised yourself you wouldn't do that again, because you honestly know the feeling is temporary, that it's not the answer?

When you're finally just too tired.

When you feel that the answer just doesn't exist?

You turn off the light, lock the doors and quietly make your way to bed.

And you try and find, buried deep within you, a tiny sliver of hope that tomorrow might, just might, be better.

Somehow.

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